1
00:00:26,970 --> 00:00:28,430
See anyone yet?

2
00:00:28,650 --> 00:00:30,630
No. What, no tax collectors?

3
00:00:30,930 --> 00:00:34,890
No. No greedy bishop with your goblet
stuffed up his cassock? No.

4
00:00:35,090 --> 00:00:38,990
No incredibly wealthy merchant we can
hold up and give all his money to the

5
00:00:38,990 --> 00:00:42,190
who'll be so grateful to us they'll give
us loaves of homemade bread and write

6
00:00:42,190 --> 00:00:44,150
ladybird books about our heroic deeds?

7
00:00:44,470 --> 00:00:45,470
No, no one.

8
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:48,130
Check that cow.

9
00:00:48,370 --> 00:00:49,370
What cow?

10
00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:52,170
Oh, the one with six legs and no egg.

11
00:00:54,230 --> 00:00:55,230
Rabies.

12
00:00:56,630 --> 00:00:58,990
We have been here for three and a half
hours.

13
00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:03,100
During that time, you have seen a cow
with a tree growing out of its head,

14
00:01:03,100 --> 00:01:07,420
turned out to be a stag, a small flying
cow with a mouth between its teeth,

15
00:01:07,460 --> 00:01:11,700
which was actually an owl, and now you
tell us you can see... A cow with six

16
00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:13,180
legs and no head. He's right.

17
00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:14,800
Where? There.

18
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:21,100
That's no cow rabies. That's our ticket
to riches and glory.

19
00:01:22,200 --> 00:01:24,380
Oh, this pass was absolutely killing me.

20
00:01:24,820 --> 00:01:27,180
I'm not moving another step till I've
had a rest.

21
00:01:29,829 --> 00:01:30,970
Oh, that's better.

22
00:01:31,470 --> 00:01:33,190
Eight miles we've walked.

23
00:01:33,570 --> 00:01:34,690
Boring old road.

24
00:01:35,510 --> 00:01:36,650
Boring old trees.

25
00:01:37,010 --> 00:01:38,470
Boring old road work.

26
00:01:39,090 --> 00:01:40,990
I don't know why we bother, do you?

27
00:01:41,370 --> 00:01:42,630
Because it's the way home.

28
00:01:42,870 --> 00:01:47,170
Graham, I know it's the way home. I have
actually used this road on at least 8

29
00:01:47,170 --> 00:01:48,870
,000 previous occasions.

30
00:01:49,230 --> 00:01:53,370
I've suddenly been struck by a lot of,
what do you call it? Memory? Yes,

31
00:01:53,450 --> 00:01:56,730
I'm just saying I'm fed up with... No,
don't put it down.

32
00:01:57,210 --> 00:01:58,210
I've had my rest.

33
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,260
Anyway, it's dangerous round here. Yeah?

34
00:02:01,500 --> 00:02:02,800
You mind toot on a hedgehog?

35
00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:04,220
Indeed you might, Gary.

36
00:02:04,460 --> 00:02:06,300
I'll get shot through the head by an
arrow.

37
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:10,000
Although in your case, even the great
Robin Hood would find himself hard

38
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:11,740
-pressed to find such a tiny target.

39
00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:16,440
Come on, let's get out of here. If Robin
Hood does see us, he'll only think up

40
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:18,820
some brilliant plan to nick our parcels.

41
00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:23,780
Then we'll train a pack of moles to
tunnel under the river for us, climb

42
00:02:23,780 --> 00:02:28,160
the tunnel in our tiger costumes, burst
out the other side, say boo, and they'll

43
00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:29,720
all run off frightened and we'll grab
the parcel.

44
00:02:29,940 --> 00:02:32,040
How long will it take to train these
moles? Why?

45
00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:34,040
We have about 30 seconds and they'll
have gone.

46
00:02:34,260 --> 00:02:35,239
Oh, no.

47
00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:38,420
It's all right, mastermind. Here comes
Rabies with the boat.

48
00:02:41,140 --> 00:02:42,880
Grab your weapons and let's go.

49
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,740
Over here, Rabies. Quick as you can.
They're getting away.

50
00:02:54,410 --> 00:02:56,510
spotted. I'd have missed it if you
hadn't said.

51
00:02:58,270 --> 00:03:02,670
So, just because we can't get across the
river, the ferret of flipping old

52
00:03:02,670 --> 00:03:04,950
Nottingham gets home safely with his
parcel.

53
00:03:05,670 --> 00:03:07,710
You know how to do something about this.

54
00:03:11,230 --> 00:03:13,670
My lord, I have tragic news.

55
00:03:14,290 --> 00:03:16,310
The Duke of Dagenham is dead.

56
00:03:18,130 --> 00:03:22,450
I said, your uncle, the Duke of
Dagenham, is dead.

57
00:03:22,750 --> 00:03:26,530
Good! But he died alone in terrible
agony.

58
00:03:26,870 --> 00:03:28,470
Well, that served the old skinflint
right.

59
00:03:28,750 --> 00:03:30,530
He had money. Tons of it.

60
00:03:30,870 --> 00:03:32,770
Do you know what he used to give me for
Christmas?

61
00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:34,650
A snowball.

62
00:03:35,270 --> 00:03:39,830
Well, he seems to have regretted his
meanness on his deathbed, my lord.

63
00:03:40,190 --> 00:03:42,210
Bring in the parcel.

64
00:03:42,510 --> 00:03:43,870
What parcel?

65
00:03:44,330 --> 00:03:48,610
It's stuck. The parcel your uncle left
you in his will.

66
00:03:49,030 --> 00:03:51,070
We can't get it out of the corner.

67
00:03:51,390 --> 00:03:52,390
Well, try.

68
00:04:02,700 --> 00:04:03,700
Sign here, please.

69
00:04:03,780 --> 00:04:05,800
What is it? No idea, my lord.

70
00:04:06,660 --> 00:04:08,100
Well, come on, open it up.

71
00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,940
Certainly, sir, certainly. Right, men,
get to work as quick as you can.

72
00:04:12,880 --> 00:04:15,000
I like parcels so good, they're
exciting.

73
00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:17,399
Yeah? There might be an animal inside.

74
00:04:17,860 --> 00:04:20,620
No, we'd have heard it. It would have
gone woof or something.

75
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:23,020
Not if it was a tortoise. It might have.

76
00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:26,580
I used to have a tortoise that went
woof. Yeah? What was it like?

77
00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:28,860
Black and white, and it rounded up
sheep.

78
00:04:29,140 --> 00:04:30,540
Oh, a sheep tortoise.

79
00:04:33,070 --> 00:04:34,970
It is a tortoise, I'm sure. Right.

80
00:04:35,350 --> 00:04:36,370
What shall we call it?

81
00:04:37,890 --> 00:04:39,810
Mansel. That's a good name for a
tortoise.

82
00:04:41,350 --> 00:04:45,230
There you are, my lord.

83
00:04:45,530 --> 00:04:47,390
Would you like to open your tortoise
yourself?

84
00:04:47,690 --> 00:04:48,730
Don't be stupid.

85
00:04:49,270 --> 00:04:51,010
Look, it's all floppy.

86
00:04:51,270 --> 00:04:55,910
Tortoises don't do this, do they? Not
the ones that survive, my lord. No, it's

87
00:04:55,910 --> 00:05:00,530
obviously something more valuable than a
tortoise. A golden robe, perhaps, or...

88
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:04,380
priceless tapestry or... A hot water
bottle?

89
00:05:05,260 --> 00:05:06,260
Is it it?

90
00:05:06,340 --> 00:05:10,740
Is this the reward I get for all the
years of love and care I gave that

91
00:05:10,740 --> 00:05:15,660
miserable, tight -fisted, hannock -faced
old penny pincher?

92
00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:18,600
I'll bet that was his best hot water
bottle, my lord.

93
00:05:19,060 --> 00:05:21,100
I'll bet he took it to bed with him
every night.

94
00:05:21,340 --> 00:05:25,180
I take a cup of cocoa to bed with me
every night, but I wouldn't leave it to

95
00:05:25,180 --> 00:05:26,180
King of England.

96
00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:28,080
That's because you are the King of
England.

97
00:05:28,380 --> 00:05:29,440
Yes, I am, aren't I?

98
00:05:30,990 --> 00:05:34,230
People shouldn't treat me like this,
should they? No, my lord, they certainly

99
00:05:34,230 --> 00:05:38,350
should not. They should give me huge
amounts of cash, shouldn't they? Yes, my

100
00:05:38,350 --> 00:05:41,770
lord, they certainly should. And you're
going to get it for me, aren't you? Yes,

101
00:05:41,770 --> 00:05:43,450
my lord, I... What?

102
00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:48,550
You will go down to the village and you
will sell this thing, and not only will

103
00:05:48,550 --> 00:05:51,030
you sell it, you will sell it for 50
gold pieces.

104
00:05:51,270 --> 00:05:54,930
But, my lord... And if you fail, I will
cut you up into very thin strips and

105
00:05:54,930 --> 00:05:56,730
weave you into a waste paper basket.

106
00:05:57,390 --> 00:05:58,390
Understand?

107
00:05:59,730 --> 00:06:04,110
God! Got to get across, got to get
across, got to get across, got to get

108
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:07,110
got to get across, got to get across,
got to get across, got to get across,

109
00:06:07,110 --> 00:06:11,050
to get across, got to get across. The
merry men shut their eyes and scratched

110
00:06:11,050 --> 00:06:12,750
their heads and started thinking.

111
00:06:13,070 --> 00:06:17,310
The problem was to get across the river
without thinking.

112
00:06:17,790 --> 00:06:22,010
They wanted to steal from the really
rich, but the river was deep and wide.

113
00:06:22,230 --> 00:06:26,390
And the road from the village to King
John Carville lay on the other side.

114
00:06:26,790 --> 00:06:31,890
They thought of wearing wings of leaves
and things so they could fly. They

115
00:06:31,890 --> 00:06:35,570
thought of making cats to shoot them
through the sky.

116
00:06:35,870 --> 00:06:42,010
Then the boldest merry man had the
brainiest brainwave yet. I know how to

117
00:06:42,010 --> 00:06:44,730
the gang across without them getting
wet.

118
00:06:48,300 --> 00:06:49,300
that you can bring.

119
00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:53,900
Fetch nails and screws and hammers.
Fetch me fellers, pegs and strings.

120
00:06:54,220 --> 00:06:59,720
We'll build a mighty bridge with wooden
sets and handrails for it. And folks

121
00:06:59,720 --> 00:07:03,200
will come from miles around and all join
in the chorus.

122
00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:07,660
Gotta get across, gotta get across,
gotta get across, gotta get across,

123
00:07:07,660 --> 00:07:11,300
get across, gotta get across, gotta get
across, gotta get across, gotta get

124
00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:12,660
across, gotta get across.

125
00:07:17,850 --> 00:07:22,730
Gotta get across, gotta get... Wait a
minute. Why does the music stop, please?

126
00:07:23,090 --> 00:07:24,089
Because we've finished.

127
00:07:24,090 --> 00:07:25,090
You've finished?

128
00:07:25,130 --> 00:07:25,949
Oh, great.

129
00:07:25,950 --> 00:07:26,950
Come on, let's have a look.

130
00:07:28,630 --> 00:07:29,630
Good.

131
00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:31,750
Oh, very good.

132
00:07:32,250 --> 00:07:33,250
Good.

133
00:07:34,550 --> 00:07:35,870
Wait a minute.

134
00:07:40,530 --> 00:07:43,130
Robin, I told you to build a bridge.

135
00:07:43,390 --> 00:07:45,550
What you've built is a diving board.

136
00:07:45,870 --> 00:07:46,870
We ran out of wood.

137
00:07:52,330 --> 00:07:53,129
A forest.

138
00:07:53,130 --> 00:07:54,990
So where do we get more wood from?

139
00:07:55,310 --> 00:07:56,310
A woodshop.

140
00:07:56,530 --> 00:07:58,370
Why not try trees, Robin?

141
00:07:58,630 --> 00:08:03,290
Because you said 20. You said fetch 20
sturdy pine trees and we use them all

142
00:08:03,430 --> 00:08:07,690
I just meant 20 -ish. It's the words of
a song, for goodness sake.

143
00:08:07,910 --> 00:08:10,310
You don't have to worry about the exact
number.

144
00:08:11,070 --> 00:08:16,770
If I said I wanted 4 and 20 blackbirds
baked in a pie and you had 26, you

145
00:08:16,770 --> 00:08:21,190
wouldn't leave 2 out, would you? You'd
bung them all in. No, I wouldn't. It'd

146
00:08:21,190 --> 00:08:22,190
cruel.

147
00:08:22,540 --> 00:08:25,420
Their little feet should all get clogged
up with pastry.

148
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,920
Raby, what's thick in chopped down
trees?

149
00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:32,059
Um, meat. Correct.

150
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:35,659
So take this up and go and get chopping,
OK?

151
00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:38,159
What are you lot going to do?

152
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:39,600
We're going fishing.

153
00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:47,240
I'm exhausted.

154
00:08:48,060 --> 00:08:50,840
I haven't felt so knackered since I ran
the Stoke -on -Trent marathon.

155
00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:53,800
You didn't run the Stoke -on -Trent
marathon. We carried you.

156
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:55,880
How are you going to get any money out
of this lot, sire?

157
00:08:56,100 --> 00:08:57,100
They're penniless.

158
00:08:57,540 --> 00:08:59,960
Look at their clothes. Oi, that's my
best jacket.

159
00:09:00,220 --> 00:09:01,360
Shh, just you watch.

160
00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:05,800
You are looking at a man who could sell
veal cutlets to a vegetarian.

161
00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:10,880
Gather round, gather round.

162
00:09:11,220 --> 00:09:14,040
I have some exciting news for you.

163
00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:16,960
Bit chilly today, Al?

164
00:09:18,030 --> 00:09:23,770
Shut legs and runny noses. A few nasty
cold sores dangling from the lips. Well,

165
00:09:23,790 --> 00:09:28,650
don't worry. By the end of the day,
you'll be so warm, you'll think you're

166
00:09:28,650 --> 00:09:29,650
the Costa Brava.

167
00:09:29,890 --> 00:09:34,430
Oh, no. Not another double glazing
salesman. Certainly not. What I've got

168
00:09:34,430 --> 00:09:39,570
you is better than double glazing. What
I've got for you is the finest central

169
00:09:39,570 --> 00:09:41,810
heating system known to humankind.

170
00:09:42,690 --> 00:09:47,010
The holy hot water bottle of St.
Charlene.

171
00:09:47,710 --> 00:09:48,710
The what?

172
00:09:48,730 --> 00:09:51,610
Surely you know the story of the blessed
Charlene and her blessed hot water

173
00:09:51,610 --> 00:09:52,610
bottle. No.

174
00:09:52,910 --> 00:09:54,850
Really? I don't either, sire.

175
00:09:55,910 --> 00:09:56,910
Then I'll tell you.

176
00:09:58,090 --> 00:10:02,350
Once upon a time, in the days when poor
people didn't have all the little

177
00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:07,250
luxuries that you lot have got, there
lived a humble fishmonger called Saint

178
00:10:07,250 --> 00:10:11,890
Charlene. One cold night, as she was
walking through the forest with her

179
00:10:12,050 --> 00:10:14,790
she was set upon by hungry weasels.

180
00:10:15,250 --> 00:10:20,090
Spare me! Spare me! Bear me, she cried,
for I am but a scraggly old woman.

181
00:10:20,350 --> 00:10:26,010
But the weasels just grinned evilly and
got out their knives and forks. Well, if

182
00:10:26,010 --> 00:10:28,970
you're that hungry, she cried, take my
fish instead.

183
00:10:29,470 --> 00:10:33,050
No, no, no, shouted the weasels. We hate
fish.

184
00:10:33,250 --> 00:10:34,430
It's got bones in.

185
00:10:34,730 --> 00:10:36,910
This fish hasn't, replied the saint.

186
00:10:37,110 --> 00:10:39,850
All fish has got bones in, said the
weasels.

187
00:10:40,110 --> 00:10:43,090
Grown -ups just pretend it hasn't to get
their children to eat it.

188
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:46,740
But the weasels just leapt on her to
devour her.

189
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:52,800
Well, if you won't take my fish, then
take from me the most precious thing

190
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:54,680
I possess, said the saint.

191
00:10:55,280 --> 00:11:00,680
And she took out her hot water bottle
from the place where she always kept it

192
00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:06,760
cold nights, and she gave it to the
weasels, and, lo, it did warm them, and

193
00:11:06,760 --> 00:11:11,460
were exceeding glad, and they went on
their way rejoicing.

194
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:18,120
And even to this very day, whenever poor
folk gather round it, the holy hot

195
00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:19,320
water bottle of St.

196
00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:25,280
Charlene stays hot. Yea, even unto the
morning, when water bottles are usually

197
00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:31,260
cold and floppy, the holy hot water
bottle stays as hot as a prawn

198
00:11:31,260 --> 00:11:32,340
vindaloo.

199
00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:44,709
It was lovely.

200
00:11:44,710 --> 00:11:46,110
Can we have another one?

201
00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:50,470
We're not here to tell these people
stories, Graham. We are here to give

202
00:11:50,470 --> 00:11:54,650
the holy hot water bottle of St.
Charlene.

203
00:11:55,690 --> 00:11:57,710
Give it to us? Yes.

204
00:11:58,790 --> 00:12:05,490
In return for the ridiculously small sum
of 55 gold pieces, the

205
00:12:05,490 --> 00:12:08,770
holy hot water bottle will be yours
forever.

206
00:12:09,390 --> 00:12:12,190
But we haven't got 55 gold pieces.

207
00:12:12,430 --> 00:12:14,100
We haven't got... Any gold pieces?

208
00:12:14,520 --> 00:12:15,760
We've got some mud.

209
00:12:16,060 --> 00:12:18,300
Would 55 pieces of mud do?

210
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:19,740
No, it would not.

211
00:12:20,180 --> 00:12:21,780
Seems very good mud.

212
00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:25,780
I don't care if it's the best behaved
mud in Sherwood. I want gold pieces.

213
00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:27,440
But where do we get them from?

214
00:12:27,740 --> 00:12:29,460
I don't know. Set up a charity.

215
00:12:29,780 --> 00:12:33,040
Get some minstrels to play a benefit
concert for you. No one's ever done that

216
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:34,040
before. Yeah?

217
00:12:34,060 --> 00:12:35,560
You could call it first aid.

218
00:12:35,780 --> 00:12:37,540
But suppose we don't raise enough?

219
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:39,220
Then I'll burn your village down.

220
00:12:39,500 --> 00:12:40,500
Good afternoon.

221
00:12:47,660 --> 00:12:48,660
Where are we going, sire?

222
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:52,300
Home. But home's that way. I'm taking a
short cut.

223
00:12:52,620 --> 00:12:55,020
I've got blisters the size of baby
tomatoes.

224
00:12:55,260 --> 00:12:57,060
And don't look at me like that.

225
00:12:57,380 --> 00:12:59,460
I know these woods like the back of my
hand.

226
00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:09,660
What do we do with all this stuff when
we've nicked it?

227
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:10,679
We keep it.

228
00:13:10,680 --> 00:13:13,060
No, we do not keep it. We give it to the
poor.

229
00:13:13,420 --> 00:13:16,860
What? All the jewels and the crowns and
the furs and the diamond necklaces?

230
00:13:18,830 --> 00:13:20,110
Most of it. A quarter?

231
00:13:20,330 --> 00:13:21,350
Uh -huh. A third?

232
00:13:22,150 --> 00:13:23,150
Done.

233
00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:27,450
Oh, almost there.

234
00:13:28,370 --> 00:13:29,370
Almost there.

235
00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:35,230
Oh, my baby tomatoes are the size of
grapefruit. Oh, here, sire. Rest them on

236
00:13:35,230 --> 00:13:39,330
blessed St. Charlene's blessed hot water
bottle. For the last time, Gary, St.

237
00:13:39,570 --> 00:13:41,170
Charlene is just a myth.

238
00:13:41,370 --> 00:13:44,750
A silly, stupid myth. I thought she was
quite sensible, really.

239
00:13:45,310 --> 00:13:48,450
Thank goodness for my unerring sense of
direction, eh? We've cut off miles.

240
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:50,650
Do you know which way home is, Graham?

241
00:13:51,230 --> 00:13:54,430
Yeah, it's across that river and over
that little hill. That's right, across

242
00:13:54,430 --> 00:13:57,390
that river and over the... Oh, no!

243
00:13:58,610 --> 00:14:00,090
There's a river there!

244
00:14:01,510 --> 00:14:06,930
Who's put up... Honestly, you turn your
back for five minutes and...

245
00:14:06,930 --> 00:14:10,130
Wait a minute!

246
00:14:10,670 --> 00:14:12,770
What is that?

247
00:14:14,030 --> 00:14:15,690
It's a centipede. What is?

248
00:14:16,250 --> 00:14:18,970
Well, that funny little brown thing
crawling up that half a bridge.

249
00:14:19,290 --> 00:14:22,550
It was the half a bridge I was referring
to, Graham, not some stupid dead

250
00:14:22,550 --> 00:14:24,610
centipede. Oh, it's not dead.

251
00:14:25,250 --> 00:14:26,250
You're wrong.

252
00:14:26,850 --> 00:14:31,390
Now, all we need is some ignorant
peasant to chop down a tree for us, lay

253
00:14:31,390 --> 00:14:36,930
across that bridge, and then we can get
across... This is our lucky day, lads.

254
00:14:38,190 --> 00:14:39,190
Peasant!

255
00:14:39,950 --> 00:14:41,450
What have you got there? Let's have a
look.

256
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:47,380
It's a tree, isn't it? How many times do
I have to tell you people you do not

257
00:14:47,380 --> 00:14:50,980
bring trees into the forest without my
permission? If you want to play with

258
00:14:50,980 --> 00:14:53,020
trees, you play with them at home.

259
00:14:53,260 --> 00:14:55,820
So now, I'm going to have to confiscate
it.

260
00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:57,560
Bring it up here, please.

261
00:14:57,860 --> 00:14:59,900
I don't think that's a very good idea.

262
00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:04,160
We are not interested in what you think,
boy. Just bring it up here.

263
00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:08,800
It's just that I... Right, men, let's
take his tree and bring it up here. And

264
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,320
you, one more squeak and you'll be
suspended.

265
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,860
By the neck from the end of this bridge.

266
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:17,300
Well, you still don't want to be
difficult or anything, but... Oh,

267
00:15:18,260 --> 00:15:20,180
now look what you've done.

268
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:22,320
Sorry.

269
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:26,180
Sorry is not good enough, is it?

270
00:15:26,380 --> 00:15:28,240
But you wanted me to bring this up
there.

271
00:15:28,540 --> 00:15:30,600
Yes. Well, it's a bit heavy, see?

272
00:15:30,900 --> 00:15:34,480
So? Well, look, let me show you what I
was thinking.

273
00:15:34,820 --> 00:15:40,040
What I was thinking was that a big,
heavy tree like this might make the

274
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:41,040
break.

275
00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:45,050
There you go, bro.

276
00:15:46,710 --> 00:15:48,470
You can't fall in the water.

277
00:15:49,830 --> 00:15:51,150
I'm always right.

278
00:15:51,390 --> 00:15:52,430
Help! Help!

279
00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:53,910
I've lost my bottle!

280
00:15:54,070 --> 00:15:57,910
It's all right. Everybody loses their
bottle when they learn it to swim.

281
00:15:58,130 --> 00:15:59,630
But you get used to it.

282
00:16:00,690 --> 00:16:01,690
What's that noise?

283
00:16:02,430 --> 00:16:03,570
Only some soldiers.

284
00:16:03,970 --> 00:16:05,730
Soldiers? What are they doing?

285
00:16:06,290 --> 00:16:09,910
Having a little swim. Look, you can see
their metal bathing trunks.

286
00:16:10,190 --> 00:16:11,680
Oh. I've got a bite.

287
00:16:12,300 --> 00:16:16,040
It looks like a hot water bottle. A hot
water bottle fish. We caught a hot water

288
00:16:16,040 --> 00:16:18,400
bottle fish. So that's how they make hot
water bottles.

289
00:16:18,700 --> 00:16:20,040
Gosh, that's really cruel.

290
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:21,440
Shall we eat it?

291
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:26,000
Congratulations, lads. Looks like we've
finally stolen something.

292
00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:28,480
A stinky old hot water bottle.

293
00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:31,300
That's really going to get us in the
history books, isn't it?

294
00:16:31,540 --> 00:16:34,540
Made Marian and her merry hot water
bottle feed.

295
00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:37,260
What shall we do with it, then? Well,
we'll have to give a third of it to the

296
00:16:37,260 --> 00:16:38,380
poor. Which third?

297
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:39,780
Let's give all of it to the poor.

298
00:16:40,920 --> 00:16:42,800
Stunning piece of generosity, Robin.

299
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:43,919
Thank you.

300
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:44,920
There you are.

301
00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:49,980
Now go and find a poor person who wants
the hot water bottle and give it to

302
00:16:49,980 --> 00:16:50,980
them.

303
00:16:51,700 --> 00:16:56,360
And the water was dragging me down and
my helmet was jammed over my eyes and my

304
00:16:56,360 --> 00:17:00,180
scabbard got caught in my tights and
kept poking me up the trouser leg.

305
00:17:00,460 --> 00:17:03,160
Hello? Are there any poor people
anywhere, please?

306
00:17:03,380 --> 00:17:04,720
Hello? Over here.

307
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:07,660
We've fallen in the water.

308
00:17:08,109 --> 00:17:09,750
Poor Graham, he's freezing cold.

309
00:17:09,950 --> 00:17:10,950
Oh, is he really?

310
00:17:11,190 --> 00:17:13,030
Do you think he'd like something to warm
him up?

311
00:17:13,310 --> 00:17:16,810
I'm sure he would. That's awfully kind
of you. There you are, then. A present

312
00:17:16,810 --> 00:17:18,210
from Robin Hood and my merry men.

313
00:17:18,869 --> 00:17:20,790
I dip it in batter and fry it for you.

314
00:17:23,690 --> 00:17:29,290
Why are you dripping all over my floor
like an extremely unattractive mermaid?

315
00:17:29,730 --> 00:17:34,710
My lord, I've been attacked by an
ignorant peasant. I've lost two of my

316
00:17:34,710 --> 00:17:41,490
men. I've got water in my hat. I've got
a gudgeon in my doublet, a funny

317
00:17:41,490 --> 00:17:47,250
lumpy thing in my tights. But did you
sell the hot water bottles? No, we lost

318
00:17:47,250 --> 00:17:52,890
in the... Oh, the water bottle. Yes,
we've completely and utterly sold the

319
00:17:52,890 --> 00:17:53,829
water bottle.

320
00:17:53,830 --> 00:17:55,850
Completely. For 50 gold pieces?

321
00:17:56,230 --> 00:18:00,950
Yes, for 50 gold pieces. Well, I haven't
actually got the money on me at this

322
00:18:00,950 --> 00:18:03,810
precise moment, but you'll get it
before...

323
00:18:04,430 --> 00:18:07,470
Before I start making a new waste paper
basket.

324
00:18:07,750 --> 00:18:10,250
Exactly. And stop fiddling with your
tape!

325
00:18:10,510 --> 00:18:16,850
I'm sorry, my lord. It's just that this
second parcel from your uncle, which I

326
00:18:16,850 --> 00:18:22,750
didn't give you at the same time as the
first parcel, because if you get all

327
00:18:22,750 --> 00:18:26,370
your presents at once, then the
excitement's over so quickly, isn't it?

328
00:18:26,370 --> 00:18:27,470
burbling! Give it here!

329
00:18:36,970 --> 00:18:41,470
No one ever found out where I kept my
money, but I held it tight every night.

330
00:18:41,770 --> 00:18:47,110
I leave you my hot water bottle. May it
keep you warm for years to come. Love,

331
00:18:47,350 --> 00:18:48,350
Uncle Dagenham.

332
00:19:10,830 --> 00:19:14,250
exactly the word. Don't sell it! I
forbid you to sell it!

333
00:19:16,470 --> 00:19:18,630
There's a fortune in that water bottle.

334
00:19:19,190 --> 00:19:23,190
Get it back before tea time and a tenth
of it will be yours.

335
00:19:26,510 --> 00:19:27,510
Butty, Butty.

336
00:19:28,590 --> 00:19:30,030
Butty, Butty, come to Daddy.

337
00:19:30,490 --> 00:19:34,070
Come on, come on, come on, come on, come
on, come on, come on, come on.

338
00:19:35,650 --> 00:19:36,850
Someone's nicked it, haven't they?

339
00:19:37,350 --> 00:19:39,010
Honestly, people will nick anything.

340
00:19:47,180 --> 00:19:48,460
in this river, you see.

341
00:19:48,940 --> 00:19:53,300
And not that it's got any money in it or
anything. It's just that it belongs to

342
00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:56,780
a friend of mine who's over here on the
freight exchange.

343
00:19:56,980 --> 00:20:01,580
And she's going back to Monte Carlo
tomorrow, so obviously she'll need her

344
00:20:01,580 --> 00:20:07,500
water bottle, or what I so low showed,
as she calls it. Not that I'd expect you

345
00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:12,720
to do something for nothing, but I've
got this brand new and open box of

346
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:16,080
licorice all sorts here, plus a purse
containing...

347
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:21,960
All the money I possess in the world,
which is approximately 47p.

348
00:20:22,740 --> 00:20:29,700
So if you find the old potty -potty and
wouldn't mind returning it, then I'd be

349
00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:30,960
very happy if you... Ah!

350
00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:32,560
Surprise, surprise.

351
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:35,080
What are you doing here? I thought you
were dead.

352
00:20:35,700 --> 00:20:38,120
Obviously it was just a beautiful dream.

353
00:20:38,460 --> 00:20:40,080
Did you say you wanted a hot water
bottle?

354
00:20:40,300 --> 00:20:42,420
Yes, but not any old hot water bottle,
you fool.

355
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:44,280
Will this one do?

356
00:20:44,360 --> 00:20:50,600
No, it will not. I need to... You little

357
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:57,400
darling. And I didn't even have to give
away my... Wait a minute.

358
00:20:57,540 --> 00:20:58,540
Where have they gone?

359
00:21:00,060 --> 00:21:02,220
Who's nicked my all sorts?

360
00:21:09,580 --> 00:21:10,880
Success, my lord!

361
00:21:14,159 --> 00:21:18,480
Success. Prepare for more riches than
you ever dreamt of.

362
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:20,600
Right, let's get counting.

363
00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:27,020
I'll buy myself an amusement arcade and
a big games room with a bowling alley

364
00:21:27,020 --> 00:21:32,760
and a horse, a GTX one with a black
leather saddle and a pair of designer

365
00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:36,160
and a huge... What is that?

366
00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:39,400
I think it's an acorn, my lord.

367
00:21:39,620 --> 00:21:40,620
An acorn?

368
00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,280
in a pot and grow a little tree.

369
00:21:57,620 --> 00:22:04,420
Get out of my sight, all of you, and
take this horrible thing with you. I

370
00:22:04,420 --> 00:22:05,800
never want to see it again.

371
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:10,640
Does that mean we can keep it? Keep
what?

372
00:22:10,860 --> 00:22:11,860
The hot water bottle.

373
00:22:12,740 --> 00:22:16,820
Graham, if I ever hear you mention hot
water bottles again, I will coat one in

374
00:22:16,820 --> 00:22:19,080
butter and jam and make you eat it,
understand?

375
00:22:19,520 --> 00:22:20,379
Yes, sir.

376
00:22:20,380 --> 00:22:21,660
I think we can keep it.

377
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:23,460
I don't understand.

378
00:22:25,130 --> 00:22:26,310
Definitely the right bottle.

379
00:22:26,990 --> 00:22:27,990
Wait a minute.

380
00:22:28,530 --> 00:22:29,810
How did you get it back again?

381
00:22:30,070 --> 00:22:31,390
Robin Hood gave it to me.

382
00:22:31,870 --> 00:22:32,910
Robin Hood!

383
00:22:33,930 --> 00:22:35,230
I might have known.

384
00:22:36,590 --> 00:22:40,590
Well, that was a brilliant day for
robbing. Did you hear about Maid Marian

385
00:22:40,590 --> 00:22:42,650
her incredibly successful robber band?

386
00:22:42,930 --> 00:22:44,350
No? What did they steal?

387
00:22:44,710 --> 00:22:48,570
One hot water bottle, 47p and a packet
of licorice all sort.

388
00:22:48,830 --> 00:22:51,890
And they weren't unopened. The sheriff
had eaten all the best ones.

389
00:22:52,210 --> 00:22:55,740
What? The ones with those little bubbly
blue bits on? Yeah.

390
00:22:56,540 --> 00:22:57,540
What a day.

391
00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:59,860
Well, at least we got the thousand gold
pieces.

392
00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:04,680
Am I dreaming, or did Robin just say,
well, at least we've got the thousand

393
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,900
pieces? Yes, the thousand gold pieces
that were in the sheriff's hot water

394
00:23:07,900 --> 00:23:08,900
bottle. Robin!

395
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,820
I took them out before I gave it back.
That was the right thing to do, wasn't

396
00:23:11,820 --> 00:23:12,820
it? Robin!

397
00:23:12,860 --> 00:23:15,640
Well, I could give them back too, but it
seems a bit of a waste, doesn't it?

398
00:23:15,740 --> 00:23:18,600
You're learning, Robin, aren't you?
You're really learning.

399
00:23:18,940 --> 00:23:19,719
Am I?

400
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:20,720
Robin Hood.

401
00:23:20,860 --> 00:23:24,100
I think we're going to make an outlaw
out of you after all.

402
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:25,660
Oh, good -o.

403
00:23:27,060 --> 00:23:28,060
Marion.

404
00:23:29,140 --> 00:23:35,000
Why don't you carry on with what you're
doing?